Saturday, July 10, 2010

Dirtbaggery 101: The Frugal Gourmet


Click here to view the video in HD!


Do you want to ski or snowboard every day? Has work got you down? Yes? Well, unless you're capable of living the life of a professional athlete, you'll have to give up some basic comforts. But let's be realistic here, being a professional athlete is totally possible for a select few, but the majority of us have neither the physical prowess, nor do we have the mental commitment to live life in the limelight. But please prove me wrong.

If you'd like to spend everyday of your life screaming down snowy mountains with some boards strapped to your feet, you've gotta be ready to make a few sacrifices. At least until you start riding pro for that steezy new company we've never heard of, who specializes in custom graphics. Until then, are you ready to be a dirtbag? It's not so bad...really! (And don't forget to freeload off Canada for the health care.)

If you're an avid back country skier, you probably don't like working too much either. You'd rather be pushing the limits and doing the Neve traverse in a day. There's no time for work.

If you've decided to thrown down and get a pass to a ski resort, congratulations, you've just drained your bank account. This will further reinforce your dirtbag status. In that case, you're probably surrounded by tourists. Those dreaded tourists. They're all drinking double espresso Kahlua mochas with ten year single-malt for chaser. What about your cafeinated rocket fuel beverage? This is the first installment of Dirtbagery-101 and we'll start with something easy.

How to make a Dirtbag Mocha:

Step one: Select the proper convenience store. You'll need a hot chocolate machine that dispenses syrup. Not the janky type that use powder. Most ski resorts will have the good kind.

Step two: Once you've located your hot chocolate machine, the cover will open on hinges like a door. There'll be a button inside the cover marked "pump". Hold it down, and you'll get straight chocolate syrup. This is the money shot!

Step two: Fill your cup with coffee and leave enough room for two fingers of cream.

Step three: Enjoy your dirtbag beverage.

Step four: Get your butt back outside, strap your planks back on and shred some nipple-deep-gnar.

If getting a real job doesn't sound very appealing, it looks like you're ready to become a full fledged dirtbag. But don't take my word for it, get out there and live your dream everyday.

3 comments:

  1. Awesome post man! Now I don't feel so bad for mooching off society.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Fred Becky was there first...

    ReplyDelete
  3. Beware of beggars in bright orange jackets!

    ReplyDelete